Monday, March 6, 2006

The "My opinion is more important than your opinion" awards.
Because Mr. Pickles put the idea in my head and I hate the Academy.

Best Chick Flick, the liking of which in no way casts doubt on your sexual orientation:
Bride and Prejudice

A Movie (note the abscense of any qualifiers, such as 'Best' or 'Worst') that carries on the torch of Kindergarten Cop:
The Pacifier

Best/Worst (I haven't decided yet) Movie that I either really like or really hate but I'm not quite sure what I made of it:
Kingdom of Heaven

Actor who most desperately needs to be shot (and not with a camera) so his stupid films won't be played on long airplane flights any more so I won't have to suffer through them:
Will Ferrel (Kicking & Screaming, Bewitched)

Best movie that I was dragged to against my will and was sure was going to suck but turned out not to be half bad (but wasn't half good either) but this is still in no way a recommendation or endorsment, unless you have a thing for Jessica Alba in a bikini or Paul Walker's chest (if you swing that way):
Into the Blue

Worst movie that I was dragged to against my will and was sure was going to suck and I was pretty much right on the money:
Chicken Little

Best movie that everyone went to see for Jim Carrey but I went to see for Téa Leone (oh, and the movie was actually sorta funny): Fun with Dick and Jane

Movie that most eases the pain over DreamWorks demise:
Madagascar

Most Average Sequel:
The Legend of Zorro

Best Tim Burton Movie:
Corpse Bride
Runner-up: Charlie and the Chocolate Factory

Best Johnny Depp in a leading role:
Johnny Depp (Charlie and the Chocolate Factory)
Runner-up: Johnny Depp (Corpse Bride)

Best Non-Pixar CG movie:
Robots

Best Non-Pixar animated movie:
Wallace and Gromit: Curse of the Were-Rabbit

Best movie based on a video game, which, all things considered, isn't saying much:
Doom

Best Pointless Action movie:
Sahara

Best use of Towels/Best Comedy:
Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy

Best Action-Comedy:
Mr. and Mrs. Smith

Best Comic Book movie/Best moving starring a Ninja superhero:
Batman Begins

Best proof that, no, you can't just throw together a movie based on a comic book and have it be as good as Spiderman/Worst Comic Book movie:
Fantastic Four

Best Fantasy:
Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire
Runner-up: The Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, The Witch, and the Wardrobe

Best adapted screenplay:
The Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, The Witch, and the Wardrobe
1st Runner-up: Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire
2nd Runner-up: Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy

Best movie that was waaaaaay to long, but still really, really good anyways:
King Kong

Best movie no one saw/Best Sci-Fi movie/Best movie featuring Space Pirates/Best movie featuring Space Cowboys/Best Movie featuring Space Ninja/Best movie based on a cancelled TV show/Best evidence that the network execu-bots at FOX are out of their ever-loving minds/Best use of made-up swear words/Best movie from which the sky cannot be taken/Best Original Screenplay/Best movie that you are not watching right now and you need to get up and run, not walk, to the video store to check out:
Serenity

Best movie featuring Lightsabers/Best Sequel/Best Prequel/Most Frickin' Awesome thing ever:
Star Wars Episode III: Revenge of the Sith

10 Favorite Movies of the year:
10. Sahara
9. Corpse Bride
8. King Kong
7. Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy
6. Wallace and Gromit: Curse of the Were-Rabbit
5. Batman Begins
4. Serenity
3. The Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, The Witch, and the Wardrobe
2. Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire
1. Star Wars Episode III: Revenge of the Sith

3 comments:

  1. Don't shoot Will Ferrel! Just make him make more movies like Elf, which was wonderfully funny and wins hands down in the category of Best Movie With A Really Angry Little Person.

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  2. Best insomnia remedy: "March of the Penguins"

    My hubby and I thought we were in for a relaxing movie date at home last week. We were right. I woke up at 4am and wondered what we were still doing laying on the couch. The screen was blue.

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  3. Other Movie Actor Who Should Be Shot (This Time For Sheer Stupidity): George Clooney

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