The Baby Cycle

Based upon the Murloc's suggestion that we should have another baby so we can use up the leftover box of newborn-sized diapers. Plagiarized from XKCD #140: Delicious.

Forensics

I totally feel like a detective! Wanna know why? Well, shut up I'm gonna tell you anyways.

So I was on the Ford website—because I've got a great offer from a really honest-looking gypsy on two slightly-used but sturdy little boys and was looking for a good way to blow the cash— and was checking out the 360º view of the 2013 Mustang (officially the hottest Mustang ever). This went from ogling the car to noticing the details in the background of the picture (the black guy's hand moves onto the table for one shot) to noticing all the other discernible cars in the background are Fords (an Expedition, an Escape, and an older Mustang, plus a couple pick-ups, and what could be a Taurus). Finally, I began wondering "where was this picture taken?"

Hmmm... this sounds like a problem for Forensic Investigation Man!

The derpier cousin of "doesn't-understand-the-world-around-him man".

The Hunger Games

Well, I might as well turn this blog into an archive of my comments on other sites. I recently (as in, five minutes ago) commented on a Video Game/Entertainment website's forums about the Hunger Games and thought I could expand on what I had said a bit more here. I write, after all, not for your benefit, but because it's cathartic for me; it helps me develop my thoughts into something tangible and releases the roiling pressure of the ideas imprisoned in my head.

So, the question posed on the forum was "what did you think of The Hunger Games?" The emotion bubbling under the surface of my thoughts since I caught it on Blu-ray, like, the day after release (thanks, Netflix!) was that I hated the movie. Not because it was bad, but because, I realized, it was true. Every bit of it was true. In fact, I nominate The Hunger Games as Exhibit B for the argument that something can be, in every sense, counter-factual and at the same time be, in every sense, entirely true.

So how was it a true story?

Archiving

This post is mainly an archive for myself, in case I ever remember that one thing I wrote (remember that one thing?) and I want to reference back to it, but I can't find it in my archives because Blogger's search is so awful and oh, that's right, I didn't write it on my blog but in the comments of another blog and oh gosh, I have no idea which blog it was and have no idea how to find it and am I really going to have to search the entire internet for it hey this is boring let's play WoW.

DEAR FUTURE SELF: YOU DIDN'T WRITE THAT COMMENT HERE. IT WAS ON BAD CATHOLIC. (Bad Catholic, of course, being the blog of Marc Barnes, that Alma Mater-attending kid whose wit and wisdom I want to have when I grow up, and who is described by this blog's other favorite writer as "wise beyond his 18 years upon this earth.")

Anywho, since I'm archiving this in a public place, I might as well let you in on the joke so you can follow along.

Marc recently wrote a piece against the heretic Christina Pesoli (whose last name is at the very bottom of the last name uncanny valley), who wrote at HuffPo about why she was hoping for a schism. In the comments, one well-intentioned but clueless commentor wrote the following:

I wonder if you have ever had a moment to sit back and think about exactly what it would feel like to be a woman in the Catholic church. Like a man, you have two vocational options: marriage or service (or single life, but that never feels like a real choice). Let's follow your life path if you choose marriage: you hope to find someone who believes the same things you do, but for goodness sake you better attract him in a holy way! Feminine but not slutty. Sexy but modest. Pretty, but don't try so hard ok? Then when you find him, despite whatever place you are in your own career, you have to immediately start making babies. I mean, you don't HAVE to, but shouldn't a good wife "take care" of her husband? Then here you are, five years later with 3 children and suddenly you can't work anymore and your whole life is consumed with diapers and other peoples laundry and you better LIKE IT BECAUSE IT'S YOUR VOCATION. So you spend your entire adulthood taking care of other people, not once getting a chance to follow one of your own passions or interests, coupled with a constant guilt for being so selfish as to even have a personal passion, that you must not be very good at the Catholic thing. Over and over. Oh woman please, stop complaining, WE "VALUE" YOU so you better deal with all the ****, literal and figurative. Isn't being a woman fun? Doesn't motherhood fulfill you totally? 

Or you could opt to go the other direction and skip the babies to serve the poor as a nun. Then, when you have spent 60 years of your life serving the poor, suddenly the Vatican, the leaders of the Church you love so much, start accusing you of not loving Jesus enough because you are "ignoring" something you thought best to stay out of, it seemed like other people were taking care of it. 

Let's say you are a smart Catholic woman and you think the Church should do something differently. The minute you open your mouth you will be labeled a radical feminist and ridiculed from your brothers and sisters in Christ. 

The Vatican called those who challenged the practice of indulgences in the Middle Ages heretics. We have come to understand.. they were probably right. What good is our 2000 year tradition if we don't learn and grow? Not all traditions are good, (like the problem of reassigning abusive priests and covering up their crimes), so stop drawing on "tradition" and stop name calling the minute someone says, "maybe we need to rethink birth control." 

I go to mass because that's where I meet Jesus. It takes a lot of mental energy to forget about people like you and the woman fearing Vatican leadership, and remember that the Sacrament is what it's all about. No matter how much you **** me off. The one, holy, Catholic and Apostolic church is the Church that brings people closer to Christ. Even women.

Korean Drummer Sighting

Remember this guy? He's been spotted again!