Place Ya Bets!

Birthday: _______
Weight: _______
Length: _______

Same rules apply: 5 points for each day by which your birthday guess is off, 1 point for each ounce, and 2 points for each quarter-inch. Lowest score wins. Psychics, clairvoyants, seers, oracles, and divinators will be automatically disqualified.

For reference:

Damien:

July 25th (his due date)
7 lbs. 7 oz.
20"

Anthony:

July 24th (one day late)
8 lbs. 3 oz.
20.5"

Regina is due February 2nd. Given a linear trend, this would mean she will be born Feb 4th, 8 lbs. 15 oz. and be 21".

**Another Important Announcement**

It's time for another IMPORTANT ANNOUNCEMENT!

Oh boy! Oh boy!

A Better Pain Scale

H/T Hyperbole and a Half

Key:

0: Hi. I am not experiencing any pain at all. I don't know why I'm even here.
1: I am completely unsure whether I am experiencing pain or itching or maybe I just have a bad taste in my mouth.
2: I probably just need a Band Aid.
3: This is distressing. I don't want this to be happening to me at all.
4: My pain is not @%&!ing around.
5: Why is this happening to me??
6: Ow. Okay, my pain is super legit now.
7: I see Jesus coming for me and I'm scared.
8: I am experiencing a disturbing amount of pain. I might actually be dying. Please help.
9: I am almost definitely dying.
10: I am actively being mauled by a bear.
11: Blood is going to explode out of my face at any moment.
Too Serious For Numbers: You probably have ebola. It appears that you may also be suffering from Stigmata and/or pinkeye.

The Laboring Murloc says her contractions fall between a 4 ("My pain is not @%&!ing around") and 5 ("Why is this happening to me??"), so we're heading to the hospital now. All further updates will be on Facebook.

Place Ya Bets... Again!

Birthday: _______
Weight: _______
Length: _______

As before, 5 points for each day by which your birthday guess is off. 1 point for each ounce, and 2 points for each quarter-inch. Also, a new rule this time around: if your name starts with "K" and ends with "atie Belland" you get 15 points automatically just to make it fair for those not gifted with powers of divination. (Kidding, of course.)

As before, lowest score wins.

For reference. Damien was:
July 25th (his due date)
7 lbs. 7 oz. (best guess)
20 inches long

Anthony is due July 23rd.
The Pregger Murloc's weight gain so far this pregnancy has been less than that of her first.
Anthony really likes stretching out, more so than Damien did in the womb.
Also, Rie's OB-GYN Kenobi has said she doesn't want her to go too much past her due date, to avoid a C-section. Narrow birth canal and all. There has been talk of inducing at some point.

Aaaaaand one more.

Haha, isn't that a great Calvin & Hobbes strip?

Speaking of water, The Murloc's just broke. I have to take her to the hospital.

Follow the birth on Twitter!

The Most Important Person on Earth.

"The most important person on earth is a mother. She cannot claim the honor of having built Notre Dame Cathedral. She need not. She has built something more magnificent than any cathedral—a dwelling for an immortal soul, the tiny perfection of her baby's body.

"The angels have not been blessed with such a grace. They cannot share in God's creative miracle to bring new saints to Heaven. Only a human mother can. Mothers are close to God the Creator than any other creatures. God joins forces with mothers in performing this act of creation.

"What on God's good earth is more glorious than this: to be a mother?"

—Joseph Cardinal Mindszenty

I Have an Heir to My Throne.

When I am gone, he shall rule over my kingdom.

Introducing Damien Alexander to the world. He says hi.

Jazz hands!

Update on the Little One.

Mad-Libs style.

Adjective:_______

Part of body:_______

Verb ending in -ing:_______

Woman in room:_______

Number:_______

Plural unit of measurement:_______

From Babycenter.com (highlight to read):

How your baby's growing:

Fingerprints have formed on your baby's (adjective)_______ fingertips, her veins and (part of body)_______ are clearly visible through her still-thin skin, and her body is (verb ending in -ing)_______ to catch up with her head — which makes up just a third of her body size now. If you're having a (woman in room)_______, she now has more than (number)_______ eggs in her ovaries. Your baby is almost 3 (plural unit of measurement)_______ long (the size of a medium shrimp) and weighs nearly an ounce.

First Pictures of the Little One.

And thus begins the transition from this blog being a place to post pictures of my cats to a place to post baby pictures.

---Update: Comments by The Murloc---

The baby's only about 4.31 cm, which is roughly 1.7 inches. Not very big, but VERY active. It was dancing a jig while we were taking a peek... I think the baby was showing off. =p

You could even just barely make out the tiny toes and fingers.

We got to see the little heart beating strongly at 160 beats per minute, and then later got to hear it. Very faint thumps, but distinct.

So, while I may not be showing and not have any pregnancy symptoms, the ultrasound confirms there's a little life form growing in me. =)

---End transmission---

Update on the Little One.

From BabyCenter.com, re-printed here in its unedited, politically-incorrect, inflammatory, and scientifically accurate form.

Though he's barely the size of a kumquat — a little over an inch or so long, crown to bottom — and weighs less than a quarter of an ounce, your baby has now completed the most critical portion of his development. This is the beginning of the so-called fetal period, a time when the tissues and organs in his body rapidly grow and mature.

He's swallowing fluid and kicking up a storm. Vital organs — including his kidneys, intestines, brain, and liver (now making red blood cells in place of the disappearing yolk sac) — are in place and starting to function, though they'll continue to develop throughout your pregnancy.

If you could take a peek inside your womb, you'd spot minute details, like tiny nails forming on fingers and toes (no more webbing) and peach-fuzz hair beginning to grow on tender skin.

In other developments: Your baby's limbs can bend now. His hands are flexed at the wrist and meet over his heart, and his feet may be long enough to meet in front of his body. The outline of his spine is clearly visible through translucent skin, and spinal nerves are beginning to stretch out from his spinal cord. Your baby's forehead temporarily bulges with his developing brain and sits very high on his head, which measures half the length of his body. From crown to rump, he's about 1 1/4 inches long. In the coming weeks, your baby will again double in size — to nearly 3 inches.

Update on the Little One.

From BabyCenter.com

I took the liberty of changing the obviously pro-life-slanted language to a more neutral tone, in keeping with the diverse opinions of this site.

"How your baby's fetus is growing: This week's major developments: The nose, mouth, and ears that are currently only part of you and at some ambiguous point in the future will become a part of a separate entity that you'll spend so much time kissing in eight months are beginning to take shape. If you could see into your uterus, you'd find an oversize head and dark spots where your baby's parasitic growth's eyes and nostrils are starting to form. His Its emerging ears are marked by small depressions on the sides of the head, and his its arms and legs by protruding buds. His Your second heart is beating about 100 to 160 times a minute — almost twice as fast as yours main one — and a separate quantity of your blood is beginning to course through his body your new appendage. His Your new intestines are developing, and the bud of tissue that will give rise to his more of your lungs has appeared. His The growth's pituitary gland is forming, as are the rest of his your other brain, muscles, and bones. Right now, your baby lump of tissue, which can be removed with all the ethicical considerations of removing tonsils, is a quarter of an inch long, about the size of a lentil bean."

Belland Family, Inc. Announces First Expansion to Popular "Family Life" Simulator.
New development promises interactive entertainment, challenges.

Area Man Joe Belland, Dictator-for-Life of Belland Family Enterprises, announced today that production had begun on the first expansion to the popular "Family Life" simulation that many fans have participated in. In a press release, His Excellency stated, "for four and a half years now, we have offered the highest quality life-simulating experience. We feel that the timing is right to add on to our already popular brand name. We hope that our users will enjoy participating in what will surely offer new opportunities for entertainment and challenges."

The as-yet-to-be-named expansion is scheduled for release in the third quarter of 2009. When asked for details of what sort of enhancements to the family-life simulations that the Belland brand name already offers would be provided by the expansion, The Almighty replied, "we feel that by branching out into the younger demographic, we can provide our fans with a unique and previously-unknown type of life-simulation."

President-and-First-Murloc Area Woman Anne Marie Belland expanded on the announcement, stating that, "after four and a half years, we felt that our Life Simulation had begun to stagnate and that by adding onto the simulated family, we would be able to freshen the experience, while maintaining the same core simulation experience that our fans have come to enjoy."

When pressed for details, She Who Must Be Obeyed admitted that production had only begun three weeks previously, and details on the finished product had not been finalized. "However," she continued, "over the coming months we look forward to sharing news and details with our fans, as they become known."

Both the God of Awesome and the Goddess of Sexiness announced jointly that the expansion would be the first in what would hopefully be many new expansions to the brand.

-----

BELLAND FAMILY, LLC is a definitely-for-profit organization dedicated to providing young and old alike an entertaining life-simulation experience, and taking over the world. It was formed on January 10th, 2004.

(With a wink and a nod to Angst Technology.)