OMGWTFBBQ They're Gay!

Over the past couple of weeks, it looks as though a couple of my WoW characters have come out of the closet and embraced "alternative lifestyles". Despite my best attempts to raise these characters in a loving and nurturing environment (well, as loving and nurturing as the lands of Azeroth can be when you have monsters of all types trying desperately to kill you), they have apparently decided that they prefer sausages to tacos.

First up, we have my main character, Gandelf. This character was originally created as a "secondary character" that I would play whenever Rie was unable to play one of our many pairs of other characters with me. Of course, this character quickly leveled past all my other characters, and currently stands tall at 51.

Being a Druid, his weapon is mainly for show. We all know Druids can't do any real melee damage. Be that as it may, I always try to have a good weapon to fall back on for those times when I run out of mana and can't cast any spells or shapeshift into bear or cat form. In the past, Gandelf has had a shovel as a weapon. No really. A shovel. The WoW modelers must have been running out of ideas.

So when finishing a recent quest, I had the option of taking a new staff as a reward. On inspection, I realized the damage and stats for this new staff were better than that of my old staff, so I chose that as Gandelf's new weapon.



It took me a while to catch, but I think Gandelf is trying to tell me something subtly. Maybe he and the purple tellytubby have something in common, with that triangle? He's apparently not prepared to come fully out and is instead making subtle hints.

Next we have Loyn (I was originally going to spell it "Loin" but didn't know what the GMs would think of that, so I went with the alternate spelling). He's the little known brother of Oin and Gloin and their other little known brother Groyn (whom I have created on another server). When Gandelf got to level 40 or so, solo questing got harder and harder, and therefore less and less fun, so I wanted to create a new character for when I got tired of the Starfire, Roots, Wrath, Wrath, ..., Moonfire, Faerie Fire, Rejuvenation, Bear Form, Growl, Maul, Maul... routine (for the non-WoW savvy, that's the series of spells you use in every combat situation as a Druid). I had already had a Dwarf Hunter on another server, but didn't get to play him much, as Rie didn't like her character on that server. I wanted to try out the hunter class, because there's something appealing about training an animal that you can sacrifice whenever things get sticky, while you run away, unharmed. Also, pets are fun because all they need is a little food and they'll love you forever. (Again, for the non-WoW savvy, Hunters have the special ability of training animals they find in the wild and using them in combat.) For those interested, Loyn's pet is a gray bear named "DeathByFur". It seemed a lot funnier when I thought of it.

So anyways, as Loyn is a Hunter, and Hunters wear leather armor up until level 40 (at which point they can wear mail), and Gandelf is a skinner/leatherworker, I periodically have Gandelf make Loyn some new leather armor. Well, when Loyn reached level 30, I looked through Gandelf's recipe book and found that the best chest armor he could make for Loyn was a Murloc Scale Breastplate. You get the Murloc scales from hunting and skinning Murlocs, like the one that lurks this blog (here fishy, fishy, fishy). So Gandelf (now somewhat gay with his triangle staff) makes Loyn a "special gift" and...



Whiskey. Tango. Foxtrot. He's not just sorta gay. He's flaming homo! Ok, I'd expect the Murloc scales to turn the armor some color, like maybe green or blue or gray, but bright purple??

Maybe the problem is that these characters play alone all the time. They have no female companionship like all my other characters. I mean, there's no way Legolamb could possibly go gay, what with Nevlonniel (Rie's character) constantly "bouncing". (It's nice to know the Blizzard animators took the time to animate the breast jiggle when the female elf characters jump up and down (which they do frequently, without you ever telling them to)).

Rie does have a character (Night-elf Druid named Tinuviel) on the same server as Gandelf and Loyn, but she doesn't play her much. I don't think Loyn has ever met her. Maybe I just need to get her in the same room with one of the boys and turn off the monitor. Although, Tinuviel is only 24 and Gandelf is 51. I mean, that is just... wrong. Loyn is a much more appropriate 32, but an Elf and a Dwarf? Would that even work?

Sorry for the PG-13 nature of this post. Sorta risque in retrospect.

Oh, and bonus points to anyone who reads this blog and plays WoW (Jeff and Rie) who know where those pictures were taken. Loyn's should be really easy, but Gandelf's may be a bit trickier.